The paradoxical Pinoy

It appears that our greatest weaknesses as a people are also a source of our greatest strengths. Puzzling? Well, yeah. From what I know, low self-esteem, for example, leads to terrible pride and defensiveness, to compensate for the perceived inadequacy. It, therefore, takes a great amount of humility for someone with low self-esteem to forgive. So where does our generous forgiving nature comes from? Beats me.

The reason could be that regarding ourselves inferior or low also makes it easy for us to be open, entertaining the foreign automatically as something superior. Our openness has led us to consider the wildest ideas from outside, including the idea of unconditional pardon.

I guess we can do roughly the same analysis for our other weaknesses that, puzzlingly, each explain the reverse, our strengths. Everything is a double-bladed dagger, cutting both ways, going either way. Here'a rundown of the most common Filipino traits:

1. Low self-esteem could lead to unhealthly self-deprecation that leaves out no space for our authentic identity OR could mean openness, being easily accomodating of the foreign.

2. A forgiving nature could mean glossing over faults that need to be corrected and penalized, foregoing the meting out of punishment, and with the offender, fully confident in that knowledge, ending up being even more brazen in committing repeated offenses OR it could mean a sense of peace or wholeness/well-being, and a predisposition to say sorry. (“Ay, sorry, po! Pasensiya na. Tao lang.”).

3. “Bahala na” (“Come what may”) may be construed as either a great alibi OR an ejaculation of great faith.

4. “Pwede na yan” (“That would be good enough”) implies either an allergy to perfectionism and idealism and fine craftsmanship due to laziness or lack of inspiration OR pragmatism (at least we get the job done no matter how slapdash/shoddy/sloppy); also may indicate a hidden passion for excellence, i.e., we know high-quality when it strikes us in the face; this could also explain our holding education in high regard.

5. “Kawawa naman ako” (“Poor me”) suggests either a wallowing in self-pity OR a strong potential for compassion/mercy for the downtrodden (“Kawawa naman!” or “Poor thing!”)

6. “Ganyan talaga ang buhay” (“Life’s like that”) means either negative resignation, or the hesitation for initiating change in one self and society, thus resulting in stasis (no self-improvement) and weak civic consciousness OR positive resignation: acceptance, even contentment, even extreme patience or endurance of suffering, when things are way beyond control and above human faculties.

7.“Nahihiya ako”/“Nakakahiya kasi” (“I’m ashamed”/”It’s too shameful”) means false shame due to low self-esteem or lack of confidence, resulting in negative fear of superiors and authority OR a strong sense of proper decorum, of knowing one’s place, resulting in social order and respect for authority/elderly.

This above item doesn’t fit right with:

8. "Palusot" means crafty rationalization and making excuses, OR talent in problem-solving, especially untying Gordian knots.

9.“Pakikisama” (“Going with the flow”) means either herd mentality OR a harmonious relationship with everybody and the potential for mass action or civic consciousness (in a long line of tradition, from bayanihan to ‘people power’ revolution) if properly motivated.

This one, however, doesn’t square snugly with this:

10.“Kanya-kanya” or “galit-galit muna tayo” (a humorous or facetious expression) (“To each his own”), which is masturbatory selfishness, closed-minded regionalism, and Family-First-ism OR strong devotion to family and strong regional loyalty and pride.

11.“Aray ko!” (“Ouch!”) means being onion-skinned (overly sensitive in the wrong way: “pikon” or “asar-talo”) OR being great in satire, in mocking the faults and foibles of self and society.

Of course, the above doesn’t fit in with:

12.“Ma at pa” (a mnemonic for “Malay ko at pakialam ko!”) (“Who cares?! I don’t.”) means shameless apathy/uncaring, being impervious to others’ needs or sad plight OR having fine breeding/social decorum, not digging one’s nose into others’ business, minding one’s own hair.

13."Ang baduy!”/"Ay, jologs!" (“Ugh, so tacky!”) means a blanket putdown on anything Filipino, resulting in putting down even the good parts OR an indication of fine taste.

14.Strong sense humor, if black, could indicate an expression of deep anger as a form of coping from something too traumatic to face squarely, or if facetious, could mean escapism, also a form of coping from harsh realities that urgently need to be addressed concretely, OR if outrageous, could indicate a happy, positive outlook in life, enabling the Filipino to endure tremendous hardship.

(As of today, I’m still figuring out where the two major conflicts are coming from.)

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Of course, other people have written about the issues discussed above. But I got the idea of explaining ourselves in another way (the way I did above) from an Ignatian retreat I had attended. I merely applied the principle I learned.

I noticed that writing about being Filipino has become a ritual for me every time it’s Independence Day. I have lots of old essays about the paradoxical Filipino that you might want to revisit. Here’s also a related piece that will keep you depressed for one year, guaranteed. (Don’t say you weren’t forewarned. Don’t worry -- depression is one step to acceptance, and strong awareness could lead to change.)

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Update:

Gee, why did I forget these other much-discussed character weaknesses of the Filipino while I was on the subject? I must find a way of inserting them in the map: “Paraphrasing the sages: can’t we, shouldn’t we all be men for others rather than thinking only of our personal well-being, shedding inggit (envy), the ‘[talangka]’ mentality (crab mentality), ningas cogon (unsustained passion), pataasan ng ihi (piss-fest), and magkano ako riyan (what's in it for me?)”?”

Add to the mix "utang na loob" ("debt of honor"). And the nonconfrontational nature, which can mean tact and politeness, charity and kindness, but becomes really bad when we say one thing and mean another, when we say yes but actually mean no.